malaysia flight 370





image from national geographic





as everyone probably has, i have been thinking about the malaysia flight which went missing just over a week ago.  it must be excruciating for the family members, the not knowing.

i am a nervous flyer and the idea of getting on a plane soon terrifies me.  flying always terrifies me but not stefan.  he spouts out facts about how flying is safer than driving, about how unlikely it would be to be in plane accident, and how there is nothing to worry about.  i believe him but i continue to worry.

i dread turbulence because i'm afraid we'll fall out of the sky.  i dread take off and landing because i inevitably start to feel nauseous.  i dread when stefan flies alone and since his new job involves more travel it means i worry more too.  i usually send him off by telling him to be safe and if something did happen to not be a hero but instead to save himself because he has two people waiting for him back home.  i don't like it when i don't hear from him when i'm supposed to, right before and after a flight.  of course, he always comes back safe and sound.  if something ever did happen, well, it's too difficult to fully grasp.  i know i'd hold on to the belief that he was okay, he saved himself and will be coming home to me.

perhaps i'm naïve, but i'd like to believe those 239 passengers will be going home to their loved ones.