a new home!

*update: new posts added if you scroll back to may 2018, i like to keep things in order! 

it's been quiet over here on the blog... 

a month of sunshine has me outdoors as much as possible... summer in the spring, in stockholm!  the swedes and my boys & i are enjoying every bit of it.  i post photos on instagram, if you are curious about a sunny and warm stockholm.

and, we were house hunting, bidding, packing (still packing) and all that comes with it... sorting, donating, throwing out, etc.  these tasks have consumed most of my free time when i am not working or parenting. i'm loving it but now, towards the end, it's taking its toll and i just want to be moved already.

yes, we bought our very own place in stockholm!  and it's almost time to move in, just a few days away. actually, stefan just picked up the keys this afternoon. i am quite excited to organize a new home for us. so, so excited :)

once we are in the new place and done with summer travel plans, i will get back to filling up this blog with content for you and for me.  i love that i created this space and so grateful that you choose to visit. 

please be patient with me as i slowly cull and edit summer and travel photos, i'll be back. 

happy summer,

connie

xo

a rainy day is for brunching

our waitress photobombing my photo

slowing one's life can come about in different ways for different people... get off the phone, breathe, invite passion into our day, being self aware, and so many more ways i am sure.

for me it starts when a friend asks me out to share a meal.  slow living is for connection...  to look a friend in the eye when we talk (not our iphone), to support, to laugh, to while away an afternoon while the rain pours down outside... only to be greeted by sunshine when we finally leave, closing the place down.

thank you anouk for a lovely slow afternoon... and the shopping.  you finding those perfect candlestick holders you have patiently been waiting for and me finding the perfect runner for my new kitchen.

let's practice slow living more often...

anouk and her candlestick holders :)

and a little bit about oaxen slip... right on the water, gorgeous interior, friendly wait staff and of course delish food.

towards a warmer climate

there is a little more that can change the trajectory of an afternoon than a mistake.

kai works on his homework but he wants to be playing on the xbox.  he settles at the kitchen table to give it a try as i make a snack.  peanut butter and apples, cucumber slices, a chocolate covered rice cracker.

i join him at the kitchen table and we work.  he studies for his science test as i prepare blog posts, edit photos, research for our upcoming vacation, plug in work dates into my calendar.  we chat, he shares school stories about the vegan speaker in his individual and societies class, the lunch on offer at school that day was a good one, the funny youtube video.  i listen. i observe.  i embrace the chit chat but notice not much studying is happening. 

i offer helpful suggestions to get him focused.  they are not welcome.  he offers no solutions, just smart alecky responses.  i find his objections to my help grating.  a lovely late afternoon at the kitchen table turns... i yell.  

a mistake that wasn't in the plan.  kai is hurt and disappointed, eyebrows furrowed, lost in my sudden outburst.  how confusing to have his mother turn on him, no notice.  the sunny day letting in warmth and light into our kitchen seems to cloud over.  

my heart breaks to have hurt him, to have turned our warm and cozy kitchen to a cold uninviting cave. 

a mistake. how does the saying go, we should embrace our mistakes and learn from them... evidently, it's hard for me.  parenting is hard. 

nevertheless when mistakes arrive, as they do, i think i am a little more prepared than the last time.  i started yoga again, i remember to breathe, i empathize, i set the tone and make it warm again.  i am the grown-up after all.

so, i make a silly face.  i bring out fabrique's nut and cranberry bars.  and another chat to reassure my love...  eventually, the clouds part and the kitchen is warm again.

i can't wait to catapult ourselves to oman for a much needed vacation... warmth and togetherness to reset, recharge, and relax.

thank goodness it's friday

it's been an incredibly long week.  stefan is away for work and i am parenting solo, work was exhausting spilling into my evenings, volunteer commitments abound.  don't get me wrong, i'm not complaining, you see i loved every aspect of my week - being in a classroom with the kids is pretty awesome, the expats i volunteer with are such beautiful women and kai is still ok to sleep in the same bed as me so there's that too. 

the days are getting longer here, the sun is shining, and kai and i have been researching pet rescue in stockholm because we will be adopting a kitty cat very soon.  we are super excited about it.

this weekend, things will get done but slower or maybe later.  i look forward to a long lie in, drinking tea, and reading.  kai and i have plans to watch a movie in the morning and spend the afternoon at the moderna museet.  then stefan comes home in the evening.  just what the doctor ordered.

have a lovely weekend.

weekend pics, cake time

it's been quiet around here, both at home and on the blog.  i put down my camera and kept the laptop shut to take care of my house and make it into a home again... i'm almost there!  trying to keep up with a house in full disarray has made for a tiring weekend.  i was knee deep in painting and spring cleaning.  breaks included reading through the spring issue of kinfolk, their home issue. 

all this putting together and reading about other people's thoughts on the meaning of home couldn't have come at a more perfect time.

you see, disarray has come full force in my home and it's not just the house.  motherhood for me has been loopy and messy this last week.  the work of a mother isn't always fun, especially when her ten year old hurts with his words and gestures, slaps away my hand when i try to show some love, and rejects my help for anything.  it's heartbreaking.  it feels all of a sudden but really i should have known.  it isn't always like this - he's been so sweet the last few days - but it seems to be shifting.  how do i parent a boy who doesn't want to be mothered?

with a little faith and courage and unconditional love, i suppose.  as i figure out how to navigate this new mothering i dream that with the putting together of our home it will somehow - magically - put together our relationship too.

 

 





jude made a home for himself out of the stacked chairs and pillows



and cake helps too :)  i woke up sunday morning wanting to eat a deliciously simple - no fuss - slice of cake.  it was such a strong craving.  and guess what guys?  stefan made the best cake ever - an almond cake complete with toasted sliced almonds topped with sugar and lemon zest.  it was light and full of flavour.  of course, he turned to his trusty cook's illustrated magazine for the recipe.  make this cake, you'll thank me for it!

in a funk

 

i am a lucky girl.  yet, despite the health of my beautiful boy, a truly awesome hubby, and insanely beautiful friends, my internal dialogue is filled with a string of complaints and worries lately.   

sometimes i feel i am battling my way through housework to do lists, emails to write and respond to, filling the refrigerator, soccer practises and games, band practise, homework, and a big one of late, negotiating my way around puberty.  i worry if kai feels loved, is he getting enough calcium in his diet, is the alarm on, are the elastic bands out of reach of the cats, especially loki?  and on and on it goes.

i am not a complainer or worrier by nature; i know this is life and i wouldn't trade it for the world.  i have simply forgotten to recognize the bliss around me.  so i will try harder to be on the lookout for those zen moments... in that freshly folded stack of towels, a perfectly shot soccer ball, kai's knack for expressing himself using fancy words correctly, the cup of tea brewed just for me.

i have a few friends going through difficulties lately whether with the health of a loved one, a broken heart, or other challenges.  life can change in an instant and all of a sudden you are living a new normal.  

i want to be thankful for all the crazy that is my normal because it's the crazy that makes those beautiful calm moments so very good, yes?  i also read that keeping a daily gratitude journal lessens worries and increases happiness.  will you try it with me?  what three things are you grateful for today?  trader jo's peanut butter filled pretzels, the tickle-themed wrestle kai and i had in bed before school, a surprise london fog tea.

beautiful moody image from here

weekend pics

so let's just say my weekend involved lots-o-laziness.  see, here is the thing... the more i do nothing the more i want to do nothing.  it's a bad state.  i need/want to run, yoga, spin and cleanse... i daydream about these activities and even bought a cleansing kit but have absolutely no will power to start and my body is feeling it... tired, slow, and jeans fitting a little too snugly for comfort. blah.

on saturday, the farmer's market at trout lake (i can't believe i have only ever been once before!) was full of delicious fall products and i even found edamame still attached to its branches (kai and i thought it was very cool).  and the carrots, so beautiful and orange! ambrosia apples were in abundance and a small baggie came home with us.  stefan cooked up a storm for us - expect a guest post by him on the delicious caramel chicken. 

on sunday, to get out of the house, we wandered out toward 49th parallel for coffee and tea and browsed a few shops along the way.  stefan came home with boots and pants and i found a lovely soft sweater (i am staying away from buying pants at the moment).

needless to say, not a very photo worthy weekend but i do love those fall colours so much.

the farmer's market







 

 

 

 

 

 

 

going for coffee/tea

 

 

 



the leo boutique was where we spent our monies; a nicely curated shop.



 

 

 

 

 

  

and some random pics at home



edamame for an afternoon snack :)









boardgame... pirates!





 

hope you had a lovely weekend!